Read a random paragraph [from my book draft] and found it awkward and feel the weight of how much work still needs to be done and how incapable I am of writing it. I feel I have worked so hard. I feel like I should have developed my writing chops and yet so often I feel like the worst “published” writer in existence. Surely, surely, I must have some writing strength that is invisible to me. Surely the book must have some special element that perhaps doesn’t emerge on the sentence level or the paragraph level.